**** I completely forgot to post this when it was done IN JUNE*****
****here it is now, What a bad Mommy I am.but it's here please read***
Today my little (not so little) girl turns 11 years old...I can't believe that when I look at her. It seems so cliche to say that, "Just yesterday she was just a baby learning to walk." but it is so true. It seems like just yesterday that my baby...was in fact a baby...
Today she is her own big person...her own pre-teen...her own mind...the opinionated 11 year old that is almost 18. I sit here thinking to myself and I can't believe that I have missed eleven years...I mean when did she grown up, I was here the whole time but when did she get so big?
I see so much of myself in her and I have made sure that I talk to her about all of the things that challenged me so greatly in my adolescent life...
My little girl is too big...I want her to be a baby again...slow down and stop growing...
I remember the day that you were born like it was just yesterday...I remember everything about my pregnancy...You have always been an eventful little firecracker and wherever you went there was surely something exciting to follow... You're little voice was so high pitched and nasaly..but it was so funny...and it was sure to always make me smile...
You loved BARNEY and Friends more than anything and you knew more Barney songs than the kids that were on Barney I'm sure of it. You were the dancer, the singer, the free little bumble bee just buzzing around.. You were the best friend I ever had and you have the most beautiful little smile that makes me melt everytime. You knew this too I think...you used it a lot!
You were my baby that loved Mandarin Oranges...and you hated green beans ( which is true still to this day) You loved to brush your teeth...or your face actually...You never seemed to have the brush IN your mouth, you just sucked off the toothpaste...You loved when I made you cookies and you never ate just ONE...You were the little "center of attention" and the BIG HUGE CENTER OF MY LIFE....
You are an amazing lovey girl...with amazing morals and a huge heart..you care about everything and everyone..you love animals...all animals, including the icky snakes and spiders that I am afraid of...You love to get dirty and you don't care about staying that way...you would rather play in the dirt than go shopping or go out... You love Spaghetti more than anything, and you love to pull the back off of a cooked crab and drink the "Crab Soup" that your Dad taught you about!
You pick on your sister everyday...but you also make sure that NOONE ever picks on her besides you. In a way it is so sweet and at the same time...it makes me crazy that you don't just always treat her like you do when noone is watching. You are so very smart..and SUPER SUPER STRONG...I mean I know that I am strong...but there is no way that I hold a candle to you. I am sure that you can dead lift more than me anyday! Your muscles are proof of that definitely.
You are the best helper and the quickest to make sure that anytime that I even drop something, you are under my feet to pick it up before I have even started to bend over, it is your way to help when you know that my back is hurting me. You are my little girl even though you are so big, and although I am sad to see you get bigger and older...it makes me happy that you are your own little person and you stand up for what you believe.
You have never been afraid to speak your mind..and although it can be a tad annoying I am so glad that I can rest assured...you will never be a follower and it shows that you are definitely the star of your show, I am so glad that you have your own sense of style and that you like what you like regardless of what others try to impress upon you.
You still say the funniest things to me, and I can remember a time when we were in Safeway about 8 years ago....We were at Customer service because they were holding a turkey for me...the day before Thanksgiving. We were waiting for them to bring me my Turkey when there was another customer standing behind me and she had a patch on her eye. I have always been very aware of when I thought you might open your mouth and I took it upon myself to gently get your attention toward me and not her. Just then the person with the turkey came up and as I was paying for my turkey your door was wide open...and just as any 3 year old would...You looked at her and said as loud as possible..." ARRRGGGHHHH MATEY!!!" I nearly died...The color left my face...I wanted to cry, die, and just push my head into the ground....The lady who was NOT amused at all walked away as I tried to push your face into my hip to get you to stop talking...I started to run the incident through my head again and as I saw you over and over lifting up your arm saying what you said..I just thought to myself..she is going to be that kid...the one that says exactly what she thinks...and you definitely are.
Some people would say that it is a curse, and of course as I see it...a blessing in a small disguise. I know that in your adult life, I will be so proud of you for your ability to stand your ground and voice your own opinion...I am glad that you will be the leader of your own life and the only thing you will follow is your heart. It makes me so proud to have you as my daughter..If I could truly express how glad I am that you picked me as your Momma..
You always cuddle up to me, and you never plan on quitting regardless of your age...You love to rub my back...sometimes...but more just to sit right next to me than to rub my back. You still call me Momma...everyday...You don't really call me Mom, or Mommy..I love when I hear you softly whisper..Momma? I love that you twist your hair with your fingers still and I remember that when you were about 9 months and stopped nursing that you started softly rubbing the backs of your ears...then when you had hair finally you ran that through your fingers.
I thank the Lord when I look at your sweet face and I watch you as you teach your sister what is right and what is wrong...thank you Emilee for letting me be your mommy, and thank you again for allowing me to hold you, and kiss you, and treat you like a baby sometimes still....Just remember that you will always be MY little BABY!!
